Meeting My Past Self

I never know why I fall in love with someone who doesn't love me back. Is it the thrill of making them want me? Or could it be that my parents didn't give me love when I was little so I think I don't deserve love? 

My relationships have been nothing but smooth sailing. It's always been something I felt like I was constantly fighting for. It was always me asking people to stay. 

I have abandonment issues because my father left me at a young age. I didn't have anyone to lean on. Yeah, I had my mom, but I always longed for my father. I always wondered where he was or what he was doing. I wondered whether it was my fault that he left. 

I'm still learning how to love myself. I'll get there soon.